To save her grandfather's club from closure, former model Renae (Bouvier) decides to turn it into a lingerie club (called Club Lingerie), in which pretty much all the female staff wear lingerie, and as entertainment, some models present lingerie on a (very short) catwalk in a very alluring way - and the idea works, the club is soon raking in the money and attracting good clientele, including top model Shelby Gator (Dawna Lee Heising) and her perverted transvestite husband Legs Benedict (Richie Lillard), who add colour to the goings-on ... and then Renae finds one of her models (Lauren Taler), who also slept in the club because she had nowhere else to stay, dead in a closet. Renae's first instinct is to get rid of the body ... but that only has her fianc� (Joe Karam) arrested, so she better makes up another plan soon, because more models are dying, one (Sydney Raye Smith) even live on stage in the nude, after she has auctioned off all her clothings. Furthermore, she's attacked by the (naturally masked) killer herself. Of course, one of Renae's concerns is that her club will be shut down, but no, the investigating cop (Glenn Bruno) needs it to stay open to catch the killer red-handed - and when everybody does indeed find out, they're in for a big surprise ...

If you see Club Lingerie as a mere old-fashioned murder mystery, you might be a tad disappointed because it by and large lacks the typical jigsaw puzzle elements that distinguish that genre, and the killer is rather pulled out of the hat than deduced in any which way ... but then again, Club Lingerie is not just a murder mystery, first and foremost it's a great deal of fun featuring quite a few very lovely girls wearing very little (though there isn't much actual nudity in the film), fun comedy interludes by quite a few fan faves like Dawna Lee Heising and Richie Lillard as a perverted couple, Domiziano Arcangeli as the jealous boyfriend of one of the models, Maria Olsen as a cookie flower girl, and Mindy Robinson as a homicidal dominatrix - who doesn't have anything to do with the rest of the film but is fun all the same. Now add to this details like a dog in lingerie, one perverted character who's actually nothing more than a muppet, inexplicably, and a little dance number to close the movie, and you're in a very weird place already, only accentuated by the directorial effort that is more reminiscent of 1970s grindhouse cinema than everything else (which goes very well with the story as such of course) ... and you've got yourself a highly entertaining little romp!

review � by Mike Haberfelner

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In times of uncertainty of a possible zombie outbreak, a woman has to decide between two men - only one of them's one of the undead.

There's No Such Thing as Zombies
starring
Luana Ribeira, Rudy Barrow and Rami Hilmi
special appearances by
Debra Lamb and Lynn Lowry

directed by
Eddie Bammeke

written by
Michael Haberfelner

produced by
Michael Haberfelner, Luana Ribeira and Eddie Bammeke

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Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
cuddly toys and
shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
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Tales to Chill
Your Bones to -
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
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tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
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Michael Haberfelner.

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
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