Hot Picks

- There's No Such Thing as Zombies 2020

- Ready for My Close Up 2019

- Midnight Taxi 2024

- Dogman Territory: Werewolves in the Land Between the Lakes 2024

- Berta 2024

- Spirit of Friendship 2024

- The Lady of the Lake 2024

- DreadClub: Vampire's Verdict 2024

- Love Kills 2024

- Rally Caps 2024

- All Happy Families 2023

- Last Night on Earth 2024

- Revenge Tour 2024

- The Culture of Hip Hop: The Staten Island Story - Part 3 2024

- Jennie, Wife/Child 1968

- Creatures of Habit 2024

- In the Dreams of Those with Unblinking Eyes 2024

- Tell That to the Winter Sea 2024

- The Magic of Santa Claus 2024

- Little Deaths 2023

- Graveyard Shark 2024

- Alien Outbreak 2020

- The Kingdom by the Sea 2024

- Common Law Wife 1963

- Dance Rivals 2024

- The Exorcism 2024

- Inheritance 2024

- Hundreds of Beavers 2023

- The After Dark 2024

- For Prophet 2024

- #ChadGets-TheAxe 2022

- The Guyver 1991

- Double Exposure 2024

- Live One 2024

- Queen Rising 2024

- The G 2023

- Talk of the Dead 2016

- Midnight Feature 2024

- Deadland 2023

- The Red Lips of the Octopus 2023

- A Gangster's Kiss 2024

- Homework 1982

- Vindication Swim 2024

- Bermondsey Tales: Fall of the Roman Empire 2024

- As I Believe the World to Be 2023

- 2015: Future Uncertain 2024

- Guy Friends 2024

- A Rocky Mountain Affair 2024

- The Moor 2023

- Insane Like Me? 2024

- Pareidolia 2023

- First Impressions Can Kill 2017

- A Killer Conversation 2014

- Star Crash 1979

- Strangler of the Swamp 1946

La Casa 4 (Witchcraft)

Witchery
Witchcraft / Ghosthouse 2 / Witchcraft: Return of the Exorcist

Italy/USA 1988
produced by
Joe D'Amato for Filmirage, Production Group
directed by Fabrizio Laurenti (as Martin Newlin)
starring David Hasselhoff, Linda Blair, Catherine Hickland, Annie Ross, Hildegard Knef, Leslie Cumming, Robert Champagne, Rick Farnsworth, Michael Manchester, Frank Cammarata, Victoria Biggers, Ely Coughlin, Kara Lynch, James Haynes, Richard Ladenburg, George Stevens
written by Harry Spalding, Daniele Stroppa, music by Carlo Maria Cordio, Randy Miller, special effects by Maurizio Trani

review by
Mike Haberfelner

Quick Links

Abbott & Costello

The Addams Family

Alice in Wonderland

Arsène Lupin

Batman

Bigfoot

Black Emanuelle

Bomba the Jungle Boy

Bowery Boys

Bulldog Drummond

Captain America

Charlie Chan

Cinderella

Deerslayer

Dick Tracy

Dr. Mabuse

Dr. Orloff

Doctor Who

Dracula

Edgar Wallace made in Germany

Elizabeth Bathory

Emmanuelle

Fantomas

Flash Gordon

Frankenstein

Frankie & Annette Beach Party movies

Freddy Krueger

Fu Manchu

Fuzzy

Gamera

Godzilla

Hercules

El Hombre Lobo

Incredible Hulk

Jack the Ripper

James Bond

Jekyll and Hyde

Jerry Cotton

Jungle Jim

Justine

Kekko Kamen

King Kong

Laurel and Hardy

Lemmy Caution

Lobo

Lone Wolf and Cub

Lupin III

Maciste

Marx Brothers

Miss Marple

Mr. Moto

Mister Wong

Mothra

The Munsters

Nick Carter

OSS 117

Phantom of the Opera

Philip Marlowe

Philo Vance

Quatermass

Robin Hood

The Saint

Santa Claus

El Santo

Schoolgirl Report

The Shadow

Sherlock Holmes

Spider-Man

Star Trek

Sukeban Deka

Superman

Tarzan

Three Mesquiteers

Three Musketeers

Three Stooges

Three Supermen

Winnetou

Wizard of Oz

Wolf Man

Wonder Woman

Yojimbo

Zatoichi

Zorro

Available on DVD!

To buy, click on link(s) below and help keep this site afloat (commissions earned)

Always make sure of DVD-compatibility!!!


Flix.com

Gary (David Hasselhoff) and his virginal girlfriend Linda (Catherine Hickland) are investigating the goings-on in an allegedly haunted house on a deserted island when a family keen on buying the place - matriarch Rose (Annie Ross), her sleazy husband Freddy (Robert Champagne) and their kids pregnant Jane (Linda Blair) and young Tommy (Michael Manchester) - arrive with their realtor Jerry (Rick Farnsworth) and their nympho architect Leslie (Leslie Cumming) ... and before you know it, the house shows why it's called haunted: A woman in black (Hildegard Knef), supposedly a witch, appears out of nowhere repeatedly and disappears again, the water taxi and only link to the main land, takes off without its passengers and with its caaptain hanged by the neck on the main sail, Rose ends up hanging down the chimney and burned by the fire in the fireplace, Jerry and Leslie are whisked off to some parallel universe where they are crucified and burned, and Freddy starts to bleed from pretty much everywhere until he's dead. Furthermore, virginal Linda is raped by the devil and Jane is possessed (can't the devil ever leave poor Linda Blair in peace). And young Tommy starts acting strange too.

In the underwhelming finale, everything seems lost, especially when he-man Gary loses his life too, though I'm not quite sure how, but then, thanks to a tape recording of her voice, possessed Jane remembers her former self and throws herself out a window ... and Tommy and Linda are saved. Thing is, Linda now learns she's pregnant, and in all her life she has been with but one man - who just happened to be the devil.

 

It's not that the screenplay of this film would have been too bad, it's a bit of a clichéed but not entirely uninteresting haunted house story. Director Laurenti's handling of the plot however destroys all the promise the plot might have had, his direction is entirely free of atmosphere, his choice of special effects is nothing short of unimaginative  (apart from the scene of the woman slowly burning to death in the chimney above the fireplace most probably), and he doesn't even try to create any kind of suspense at all. Add to that underwhelming camerawork and lighting that resembles carelessly shot homemovies and a bunch of increasingly wooden actors (David Hasselhoff - need I say more ?), and you've got one movie you needn#t have seen. It's not even so-bad-it's-good, it's just so-bad-it's-bad-again.

 

review © by Mike Haberfelner

 

Feeling lucky?
Want to
search
any of my partnershops yourself
for more, better results?
(commissions earned)

The links below
will take you
just there!!!

Find Witchery
at the amazons ...

USA  amazon.com

Great Britain (a.k.a. the United Kingdom)  amazon.co.uk

Germany (East AND West)  amazon.de

Looking for imports?
Find Witchery here ...

Thailand  eThaiCD.com
Your shop for all things Thai


Thanks for watching !!!

 

 

In times of uncertainty of a possible zombie outbreak, a woman has to decide between two men - only one of them's one of the undead.

 

There's No Such Thing as Zombies
starring
Luana Ribeira, Rudy Barrow and Rami Hilmi
special appearances by
Debra Lamb and Lynn Lowry

 

directed by
Eddie Bammeke

written by
Michael Haberfelner

produced by
Michael Haberfelner, Luana Ribeira and Eddie Bammeke

 

now streaming at

Amazon

Amazon UK

Vimeo

 

 

 

Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
cuddly toys and
shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

is all of that.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
-
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
the twisted mind of
screenwriter and film reviewer
Michael Haberfelner.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

the new anthology by
Michael Haberfelner

 

Out now from
Amazon!!!