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The Arena / La Rivolta delle Gladiatrici
Naked Warriors

USA / Italy 1974
produced by
Mark Damon, Roger Corman (executive) for New World Pictures/Rover Film
directed by Steve Carver
starring Margaret Markov, Pam Grier, Lucretia Love, Paul Muller, Daniele Vargas, Marie Louise, Mary Count, Rosalba Neri (as Sara Bay), Vassili Karis (as Vic Karis), Mimmo Palmara (as Dick Palmer), Sid Lawrence, Antonio Casale (as Anthony Vernon), Franco Garofalo (as Christopher Oakes), Petro Ceccarelli (as Peter Cester)
cinematography by Aristide Massaccesi (= Joe D'Amato), music by Francesco De Masi, edited by Joe Dante, Jann Carver

review by
Mike Haberfelner

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Ancient Rome: Pam Grier & Margaret Markov are captured by some Romans & sold off as slaves to the neighbouring arena, their main job being cleaning up after the men fought (!), cooking, serving drinks & fullfilling the gladiators' desires, if you catch my drift. But after a violent foodfight (!!) someone decides to have female gladiators, too, & the audience seems crazy about it. But after Grier has to kill her opponent (& fellow slave) in the arena, the girls realize the seriousness of the situation & Markov wants to make an escape attempt. Of course it fails, & Grier & Markov are pittet against each other in the arena. But instead of killing each other, they turn the tables against their masters & lead a gladiators revolt, with the audience totally oblivious to the seriousness of the situation, cheering at the proceedings as long as there's blood spilt, & not caring whose blood it actually is. & though the revolt is finally overthrown - thanks to Paul Muller, the only Roman with brains enough to go get some soldiers - Grier & Markov succeed to escape through the catacombs ...

 

Even though this synopsis sounds somewhat exciting, the movie is not. The pacing of this movie is somewhat off, the action - especially the fighting women, who look terribly at unease with the ancient weapons - is badly staged, & the female leads - even though they all eventually flash their breasts - are just plain wooden, even Pam Grier, who was at the verge of the (short) height of her career back then.

 

review © by Mike Haberfelner

 

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In times of uncertainty of a possible zombie outbreak, a woman has to decide between two men - only one of them's one of the undead.

 

There's No Such Thing as Zombies
starring
Luana Ribeira, Rudy Barrow and Rami Hilmi
special appearances by
Debra Lamb and Lynn Lowry

 

directed by
Eddie Bammeke

written by
Michael Haberfelner

produced by
Michael Haberfelner, Luana Ribeira and Eddie Bammeke

 

now streaming at

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Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
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shopping mall Santas,
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Tales to Chill
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is all of that.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
-
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
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to the weirdly romantic,
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Michael Haberfelner.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

the new anthology by
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Out now from
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