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Ninja Squad

Hong Kong 1987
produced by
Joseph Lai, Betty Chan for IFD Films & Arts
directed by Godfrey Ho
starring Richard Harrison, David Wheeler, Eduardo Martinez, Timalden, Kelvin James McHugh, Karl Tullogh, John M.Marshall, John Stevens, Eric Redner, Gerry Broad, Anita Roman, Celia Luis, Silvia Rod, Jenny Hansen
screenplay by Stephen Soul, Godfrey Ho, based on a story by AAV Creative Unit

Richard Harrison's Ninja movies, Ninja Master Gordon

review by
Mike Haberfelner

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As ever so often with the Ninja movies IFD Films & Arts produced starring Richard Harrison, this is actually two films rolled into one, or put differently, newly shot scenes of Ninjas fighting combined with an already existing movie that has nothing whatsoever to do with Ninjas.

The plot ?

The existing movie is an actioner from the Philippines (presumably) concerning one character called Billy, who comes home after ten years to find his family bullied by big boss Larry - in equal parts landgrabber, loanshark, drugdealer and armsdealer - and his gang. And since he's quite a fighter, Billy puts up defense and soon hits Larry where it hurts (figuratively speaking).  Actually, Billy wants to join the police force, but the chief of police, his girlfriend Lisa's father, thinks he's a lowdown cheap little punk and even forbids his daughter to see Billy.

Meanwhile, boss Larry tries to get back at Billy, and has his mum shot and his sister kidnapped. Since he can't get no help from the police and he can't even see his girlfriend, Billy starts drinking heavily, and soon enough picks up pretty Ivy and spends the night with her. But Larry's when goons see Billy totally drunk, they follow him to Ivy's appartment ... but when they shoot him, they hit Ivy instead - and now Billy knows he just has to fight Larry on his own.

Of course after many more fights and shoot-outs, Billy erradicates Larry's gang and defeats Larry, but the police arrives just before he can kill him ... too bad actually, because a badly wounded Larry still musters up enough strength to lift a gun and shoot Billy before being arrested by the police.

The second story concerns Ninja Master Gordon (Richard Harrison), who is challenged by one evil Ninja, Ivan the Red (David Wheeler) to fight for supremacy over the ninja world (or something). Gordon refuses, so each full moon, Ivan the Red fights and kills one of Ninja Master Gordon's Ninja friends. Finally, Ivan fights Gordon and Gordon wins.

A feeble connection between the two stories is made by claiming Billy was ninja Master Gordon's Ninja student (even if he does hardly any martial arts during the whole film, instead mainly uses firearms). Ivan also claims he has killed Billy, even if the film tells us otherwise ...

 


Yes, of course this is a bad film, the two stories cobbled together don't make much sense and neither story is exceptionally good (even if the old film features quite some comptetently staged shoot-outs). But if you are (like me) a movie masochist, you might actually enjoy the badly cobbled toghether plot, laugh at the ridiculous Ninja outfits and simply love the headbands the Ninjas are wearing, all saying Ninja (so as not to confuse them with someone else ?). Not the funniest of IFD Films & Arts maybe, but still worth a laugh or two.

 

review © by Mike Haberfelner

 

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Thanks for watching !!!

 

 

In times of uncertainty of a possible zombie outbreak, a woman has to decide between two men - only one of them's one of the undead.

 

There's No Such Thing as Zombies
starring
Luana Ribeira, Rudy Barrow and Rami Hilmi
special appearances by
Debra Lamb and Lynn Lowry

 

directed by
Eddie Bammeke

written by
Michael Haberfelner

produced by
Michael Haberfelner, Luana Ribeira and Eddie Bammeke

 

now streaming at

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Vimeo

 

 

 

Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
cuddly toys and
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love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

is all of that.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
-
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
the twisted mind of
screenwriter and film reviewer
Michael Haberfelner.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

the new anthology by
Michael Haberfelner

 

Out now from
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