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Deathstalker

USA / Argentina 1983
produced by
James Spardellati, Roger Corman (executive), Hector Olivera (co) for Palo Alto, Aries Cinematográfica/New World Pictures
directed by John Watson (= James Spardellati)
starring Rick Hill, Barbi Benton, Richard Brooker, Lana Clarkson, Victor Bo, Bernard Erhard, August Larretta
written by Howard R. Cohen, effects by John Carl Buechler

review by
Mike Haberfelner

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A sorceress tells Barbarian outlaw Deathstalker (Rick Hill) to find the 3 symbols of power - a sword, a chalice & an amulet - so that they don't fall into the hands of evil magician & ruler of the land Munkar (Bernard Erhard) ... & furthermore, he also holds beautiful princess Cordille (Barbi Benton) prisoner.

The sword is rather easy to find, & it even ahs the side-effect that it gives its bearer invincibility, the other 2 symbols might be a tad harder since Munkar already holds them. But Deathstalker is noone to yield easily & so decides to enter the lion's den - & he is not even alone, since soon he is joined by Salmaron (August Larretta) a demon who with Deathstalker's help regained human form, Oghris (Richard Brooker), a fellow Barbarian who wants to go to the castle to fight in a tournament for Munkar's succession, & Kaira (Lana Clarkson), who wants pretty much the same but tries to put some emphasis on it by walking around mostly topless -  it's not long before she & Deathstalker have sex, of course.

At Munkar's castle, our motley crew is welcomed with open arms, and, after a big brawll, Deathstalker even wins princess Cordille for a night ... but Munkar woudn't be evil, was not a string attached to that, for he doesn't actually send Cordille around to Deathstalker but an assassin in the shape of Cordille ... who of course fails to kill Deathstalker but succeeds in stabbing Kaira.

On the first day of the tournament, Oghris proves to be the great champion, but he is in cahoots with Munkar & the next night tries to kill Deathstalker - but pays with his own life.

The next day, Deathstalker wins the tournament, but of course the succession to the throne, as was the prize for the winner, is not his, & he has to fight Munkar & his guards - who prove to be a resistant bunch, since decapitation does not always have the intended effect -, & he is only helped by the girls of Munkar's harem, who have chosen this moment as the time ripe for revolt.

Of course in the end Deathstalker wins over insurmountable odds & he destroys the 3 symbols of power lest anyone can become as powerful (& evil) as Munkar was. Munkar, he doesn't kill himself, but throws to the crowd, who immediately tear him apart (literally).

 

This cheap fantasy-barbarian movie produced in the wake of Conan the Barbarian is so poorly made it is almost endearing (though only almost) - the sets are obviously cardboard, the creature-effects are as cheap as cheesy, the action is definitely pedestrian & the gore-effects are just inadequate at best. What is totally missing though is any feel for the genre or for atmosphere, not at all helped by a lead who lacks both charisma & acting talent, & whose hairdo would be considered a capital crime this side of the 80's.

Not even the many topless girls in bigger & smaller parts of the movie can effectively save it.

 

review © by Mike Haberfelner

 

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In times of uncertainty of a possible zombie outbreak, a woman has to decide between two men - only one of them's one of the undead.

 

There's No Such Thing as Zombies
starring
Luana Ribeira, Rudy Barrow and Rami Hilmi
special appearances by
Debra Lamb and Lynn Lowry

 

directed by
Eddie Bammeke

written by
Michael Haberfelner

produced by
Michael Haberfelner, Luana Ribeira and Eddie Bammeke

 

now streaming at

Amazon

Amazon UK

Vimeo

 

 

 

Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
cuddly toys and
shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

is all of that.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
-
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
the twisted mind of
screenwriter and film reviewer
Michael Haberfelner.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

the new anthology by
Michael Haberfelner

 

Out now from
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