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Café Flesh

USA 1982
produced by
Rinse Dream (= Stephen Sayadian), F.X. Pope (= Francis Delia) for Carribbean Films
directed by Rinse Dream (= Stephen Sayadian)
starring Andy Nichols, Paul McGibboney, Pia Snow (= Michelle Bauer), Marie Sharp, Darcy Nychols (= Tantala Ray), Joey Lennon, Neil Podorecki, Robert Dennis (= Dennis Edwards), Kevin Jay (= Kevin James (II)), Dondi Bastone, Pez D.Spencer (= Paul Berthell), Hilly Waters, Autumn True, Elizabeth Anastasia, Polly Ester, Michael Cola, Ken Starbuck, Eric Nile, Angel Selby, D'Elliot Marcussi, Kim Collier, Jeff Conner, Becky Savage, Sue Ravan, Terri Copeland
written by Herbert W.Day (= Jerry Stahl), Rinse Dream (= Stephen Sayadian), music by Mitchell Froom, special stage effects by Paul Berthell

Café Flesh

review by
Mike Haberfelner

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A post-doomsday world: 99% of the human populace are Negatives, means they can no longer have sex, though they crave for it. Only one percent are Positives, and they are forced to perform sexual acts in elaborate shows meant to give the Negatives some sort of substitute to actually having sex - and these shows are sold out every evening, too.

Nick (Paul McGibboney) and Lana (Michelle Bauer in her Pia Snow identity) are a couple of Negatives, and they're deeply in love with each other - they just can't have sex. Every night, they visit Moms' (Darcy Nychols) Café Flesh, one of above mentioned sex clubs, and while Lana gets turned on by the sexual acts more than the usual Negative, Nick gets more and more depressed, mainly because he just can't have with Lana what they have on stage.

One day during a raid, a friend of theirs, Angel (Marie Sharp), is taken in as a Positive, and in a matter of hours, she can be seen performing on the very stage she has only watched from the auditorium so far - and the whole thing is a liberating experience for her. Lana is so turned on by her performance that she steals away and masturbates in a quiet corner, something the normal Negative shouldn't even be capable of doing.The club's MC Max Melodramatic (Andy Nichols) peeps on her when doing so though - and comes to his own conclusions.

It's a great day at Café Flesh when Johnny Rico (Kevin Jay), superstar fucker, pays the place a visit. Lana gets totally turned on when she sees him perform, and when Max Melodramatic surprisingly drags her to the stage, she has no problems having sex with him, turning out to be a Positive after all.

Nick leaves the place, heartbroken.


The epitomy of arthouse meets porn: Sure, this film contains hardcore fucking, there are no two ways about it, but the sex performances can in this instant at the same time be labelled as performing art, surreal little setpieces of a surreal nature that are at least as weird as they are explicit, as far-out as they are erotic. And as for the plot: on the surface it might be little more than a collection of post-doomsday clichés of the sexual variety, but it's actually also a satire on porn and its reception itself as well as an uneasy comment on this then new veneral isease, AIDS.

In all, this is nothing like any other porn you have ever seen, and highly recommended.


By the way, there is an ongong debate if B-movie star Michelle Bauer, who plays a lead role in this film, has ever (sexually) performed in any hardcore porn flicks. She claims she has always used a body double for the explicit scenes, and judging from this film, this might be true: While her masturbation scene is surprisingly softcore, her one sex scene is filmed and cut in a way you really cannot tell whose body it is that is actually fucked. Sure, it might be hers, but then why film the whole scene in such a (choppy) way?


review © by Mike Haberfelner


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Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
cuddly toys and
shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

is all of that.


Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
the twisted mind of
screenwriter and film reviewer
Michael Haberfelner.


Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

the new anthology by
Michael Haberfelner


Out now from




On the same day
a Burglar wants to kill you
and your Ex wants
to make up ...
... and for the life of it,
you can't decide


A Killer Conversation

produced by and starring
Melanie Denholme
directed by
David V.G. Davies
written by
Michael Haberfelner
Ryan Hunter and
Rudy Barrow

out now on DVD