Plaguers

USA 2008
produced by
Josephina Sykes, Daniel L. Blanc (executive), H.P. Garfield (executive), Alan Novak (executive), Jonathan Novak (executive), John Whittington (executive) for Nightfall Pictures, Rockaway Pictures
directed by Brad Sykes
starring Alexis Zibolis, Noelle Perris, Steve Railsback, Paige La Pierre, Jared Michaels, Bobby James, Erica Browne, Chad Nell, Stephanie Skewes, Maija Polsley, David P.Johnson
written by Brad Sykes, music by Terry Huud, special effects by Heather Mages, Julie Taylor, special effects makeup by Ron Karkoska, Mark Villalobos, visual effects by Adam Lima, creature design by Mike Brown

review by
Mike Haberfelner

Outer space: When freightship Pandora receives a distress call and comes to the rescue of a ship called Lola, the crew simply isn't prepared to pick up four women (Noelle Perris, Paige La Pierre, Erica Browne, Stephanie Skewes) with model-good looks dressed in short dresses and silver boots, who soon try to seduce all crewmen. Nor is the crew of course prepared for these four gorgeous women to turn out to be violent pirates who soon put them into cages to get their hands on the Pandora's cargo. But if they thought they had problems now, they were dead wrong, because in the fight between crew and pirates, a certain orb the crew thought to be some kind of valuable powersource gets cracked open - however, once released, the orb's content turns everybody coming into contact with it into murderous zombies ... and before you know it, the survivors from a massive zombie onslaught (with everybody being killed returning as a zombie) are down to three, the ship's captain Darian (Alexis Zibolis), her trusted cyborg Tarver (Steve Railsback) and the pirates' leader Kyra (Noelle Perris) - and the only way to end this whole mess is to blow up the ship and make it out in time in the escape pod. And of course, cyborg Tarver bravely sacrifices his computer life keeping the zombies off the ladies' back. Once at the escape pod though, Kyra stabs Darian (I'm not quite sure why) to make it back to safety alone - but as a thank you, she is almost immediately killed by a zombie who has been hiding in the escape pod. Cap Darian on the other hand survives the knife-in-the-belly kind of stabbing pretty much unscathed, and makes it to the ship's airlock, where she finds an empty coffin in which she hides with an oxygen tank when all the zombies and a big alien attack - and then she has herself ejected just in time to evade the big explosion she herself has triggered ... but oh my, only now does she realize she has taken the weird orb that started it all with her ...

Ok, there are a few things to like about this film: The gore effects are pretty explicit and to a point even inventive, the zombie makeup is nice in a gruesome way, and the gorgeous pirates in short dresses and silverboots as well as the weird-looking alien in the end (where did that one come from?) are simply great from a camp point of view.

Yet the film as a whole isn't exactly the stuff cult sci-fi is made of, it's a rather pointless piece of space horror of the something is loose on our ship-variety that doesn't only fail to tell an original story but also fails to highlight its ironic aspects (and there are plenty). A not exactly imaginative directorial effort, a very antiquated view of spacetravel, and an underwhelming cast (actingwise, at least the pirates look great) don't help much either. Admitteldy, this film might slightly amuse you (for all the wrong reasons), but there are far better and/or funnier films around.

review © by Mike Haberfelner

 

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