It should have been a simple bus journey to the Grand Canyon, with your typical a bit too diverse group having booked the same trip, from the religious nutters (Milly Sanders, Braxton Davis) to the drugged to the brim goths (Tonya Kay, Jeremy Thorsen), with veteran Simon (Damien Puckler) suffering from PTSD thrown in just for good measure ... but then the bus breaks down in the middle of nowhere, and there's no cellphone signal - but there's a ghost town nearby, which it seems has served as a themepark celebrating some of the world's most vicious serial killers - Ed Gein (Gary Kasper), Jeffrey Dahmer (Marion Kopf), John Wayne Gacy (Hawk Walts), Albert Fish (Rick Williamson), the Zociac Killer (John C. Epperson) and of course (a very sexy female) Jack the Ripper (Mary LeGault). And if this was a theme park until recently, there might still be a phone, right?

Well, finding a phone will soon become the least problem for our motley crew, as it seems the themepark (if you even want to call it that) has just opened under the new management of JB (Semi Anthony), who just happens to be an attorney of some rather dark forces, and he is in the process of bringing above killers back to life ... which the goth kids only speed up (and live to regret it), and suddenly, the place turns into a slaughterhouse, as these six killers try to outdo one another in slaughtering the bus passengers. But even though the killers have been brought back to life, they're anything but invulnerable, so can be killed, and are so jealous of one another they even get at one another's throat occacionally. Still, our entirely and naturally human heroes seem to be up against overwhelming odds ...

Now Butchers might not be the Citizen Kane of horror cinema (and the movie's makers probably have set out for it to be) ... but at the same time, it's lot of fun, especially - but not only - for slasher movie fans: What you get here is something that works within slasher movie confines and yet is more than simple genre fodder, as with the twist of giving the audience six (well-portrayed and diverse) killers for the price of one AND an unusual baddie (Semi Anthony) overlooking it all it really expands on the typical genre narrative. And with a set of interesting characters brought to life by nice performances, cool gore and action setpieces and a directorial effort going for more than just the obvious, you get yourself a very decent genre flick.

review � by Mike Haberfelner

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In times of uncertainty of a possible zombie outbreak, a woman has to decide between two men - only one of them's one of the undead.

There's No Such Thing as Zombies
starring
Luana Ribeira, Rudy Barrow and Rami Hilmi
special appearances by
Debra Lamb and Lynn Lowry

directed by
Eddie Bammeke

written by
Michael Haberfelner

produced by
Michael Haberfelner, Luana Ribeira and Eddie Bammeke

now streaming at

Amazon

Amazon UK

Vimeo

Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
cuddly toys and
shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
is all of that.

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to -
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
the twisted mind of
screenwriter and film reviewer
Michael Haberfelner.

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
the new anthology by
Michael Haberfelner

Out now from
Amazon!!!