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Scarlet Fry's Junkfood Horrorfest

USA 2005
produced by
Brian Crow, Walter Ruether for Chained to the Wall-Productions
directed by Brian Crow, Walter Ruether
starring Calico Cooper, Werner, Cara Moody, Kyle Konvalin, Laramie Jackson, Walter Ruether a.k.a. Scarlet Fry, Brian Crow, Keri Weikoff, Paul Hill, Charles Schmidt, John Tomaszewski, Tasha Castor, Navon, Sasha Lightstone, Danielle Fisher, Alex Thompson, Evan Lucas, Sherri Soltis, Brisa Sanchez, Michael Tank, Mike Darma, Joanna McCarty
written by Brian Crow, Walter Ruether, music by Howard Shaw, Ryan Roxie, special effects by Walter Ruether & Suzie

Scarlet Fry

review by
Mike Haberfelner

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A girl (Calico Cooper) wants to buy drugs from her pusher (Michael Tank), but all he sells her is a videotape. Enraged she beats him to a pulp. Later though she watches the tape anyhow.

On the tape, a zombie-like guy with a Southern accent, Scarlet Fry (Walter Ruether), hosts a sextet of short stories:

  • Butcher Jack's (Brian Crow) fridge is disappointingly empty, so he goes to a nieghbouring laundromat, picks up Betty (Keri Weikoff), a girl who's new to the neighbourhood, invites her over to dinner - but once they are in his appartment, Betty has to find out that it's her who's the dinner ...
  • A nurse (Cara Moody) is pushed over the edge by her wheelchair-bound patient (Paul Hill), so she hires a hitman (Charles Schmidt) to finish him off. Then she heads off with the hitman. This episodes is in black and white and with no dialogue.
  • Donnie (Kyle Konvalin) has found a great new way to make money to buy dope: Spanking a queer (Werner) with his skateboard. But when he invites his friends (Laramie Jackson, John Tomaszewski) to join him in making a little dough, they re disgusted - but still participate. Later they tease Donnie about it though and even tell his girlfriend (Tasha Castor), so much so that the two have a big rowe and Donnie gets so enraged that  he equips his board with spikes and kills the queer with it. Then he feels better, until his girlfriend sontinues teasing him about the whole thing, and he suffocates her with his pillow. Only then can he enjoy inner peace and harmony (?).
  • A guy (Walter Ruether) comes home, sits down in his bathtub, and slits his veins open.
  • A girl (Sasha Lightstone) just can't take her boyfriend's (Navon) Satanist shenanigans anymore, so she shoots him dead, but the devil sees to it that our Satanist rises from the dead and kills her.
  • Sarah (Danielle Fisher) tells Reuben (Alex Thompson) that she is expecting his child, and he goes totally bonkers about it, calls her names and all of that shit. So she does the only sensible thing to do, chains him to his bed, sews his lips shut and tortures him to death (in a scene reminiscent of Takashi Miike's Audition).

Available on DVD!

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It's probably fair to say that Scarlet Fry's Junkfood Horrorfest is no classic of horror cinema, and it probably wasn't even intended to be. What the film is though is one of these low budget wonders that are way more entertaining than anything big budget Hollywood genre cinema has brought out in a long time, a film in the tradition of Tales from the Crypt and Herschell Gordon Lewis, but also of PRC's shockers from the 1940's which were quite often more entertaining than the comparable output from the more respected competition. Sure, the film has its deficiencies, not all the actors are really up to their task (though for example Brian Crow as butcher Jack is perfectly creepy), the lighting is at times less than perfect, and some of the stories could have done with a better punchline, but that said, the film is very well-directed (not always the case with independent, no budget-films), well filmed and well paced, and while it might not be the best shocker, not even the best horror-anthology around, it sure enough is enjoyable from start to finish, and it's certainly more than horror junkfood, as the title would suggest.

 

review © by Mike Haberfelner

 

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Thanks for watching !!!

 

 

In times of uncertainty of a possible zombie outbreak, a woman has to decide between two men - only one of them's one of the undead.

 

There's No Such Thing as Zombies
starring
Luana Ribeira, Rudy Barrow and Rami Hilmi
special appearances by
Debra Lamb and Lynn Lowry

 

directed by
Eddie Bammeke

written by
Michael Haberfelner

produced by
Michael Haberfelner, Luana Ribeira and Eddie Bammeke

 

now streaming at

Amazon

Amazon UK

Vimeo

 

 

 

Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
cuddly toys and
shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

is all of that.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
-
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
the twisted mind of
screenwriter and film reviewer
Michael Haberfelner.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

the new anthology by
Michael Haberfelner

 

Out now from
Amazon!!!