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A Nymphoid Barbarian in Dinosaur Hell
Dark Fortress

USA 1991
produced by
Brett Piper, Alex Pirnie for Troma
directed by Brett Piper
starring Linda Corwin, Alex Pirnie, Mark Deshaies, Paul Guzzi, Al Hodder
written by Brett Piper, music by the Astral Warriors, special effects by Brett Piper/Cheap Trick Unlimited

review by
Mike Haberfelner

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A postnunclear wasteland, when dinosaur-like creatures, mutants & general evildoers of all sorts have taken over the planet again: Leah (Linda Corwin) is wandering the woods in a brief outfit, but soon held up by a trio of mutants & about to be raped when Marn (Paul Guzzi) saves her. From here opn they decide to walk the woods together & even have sex on a beach (offscreen) before Clon (Alex Pirnie) & his mutants spot them & decide to kidnap Leah. A fight ensues of course, which Marn loses & is left on the beach to die while Leah is dragged off. Marn is however found by an old man (Al Hodder), who nurses him back to health & even gives him a gun - a weapon almost non-existent in this post-nuclear world.

Leah meanwhile manages to escape her captors when they pause to watch 2 dinosaurs fight, & soon runs into the hands of a masked stranger (Mark Deshaies), who gives her food & accommodation in his hut, shows her how to make fire - with a lighter - & gives her some pre-nuclear children's books to learn how to read. But when Leah sees the stranger's distorted face beneath the mask, she runs off in horror - only to make up with him the very next day by bringing him fish. She soon talks him into helping her finding Marn, but instead they of course run into Clon & his men again - an encounter the masked stranger wouldn't survive.

Leah is dragged to Clon's castle, where the villain tires to rape her, but as she strongly fights back, he instead throws her to his mutants & assorted beasts to let them have their way. But enter Mark again, who rescues Leah with firepower, & together they also dispose of Clon ...


This movie has all the right ingredients: a postnuclear world, a heroine ressed in brief skins, dinosaurs (actually very nicely done stop-motion effects) - & manages to be incredibly dull.

The main reason for this is that the movie totally fails in blending its elements into each other, instead tells an overused story that could be set in any time & place & looks rather like a game of tag in the woods with an attempted rape-scene with very brief nudity .. well, tagged on. That there are dinosaurs in the movie, too, seems to be of little consequence.

Another flaw is of course, that the movie - despite an ironic introduction - takes itself totally seriously, & all the actors (especially Paul Guzzi & Alex Pirnie) totally lack the charisma to carry the movie - though I think Linda Corwin would have fared better was her role a comedic one.


review © by Mike Haberfelner


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Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
cuddly toys and
shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

is all of that.


Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
the twisted mind of
screenwriter and film reviewer
Michael Haberfelner.


Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

the new anthology by
Michael Haberfelner


Out now from




On the same day
a Burglar wants to kill you
and your Ex wants
to make up ...
... and for the life of it,
you can't decide


A Killer Conversation

produced by and starring
Melanie Denholme
directed by
David V.G. Davies
written by
Michael Haberfelner
Ryan Hunter and
Rudy Barrow

out now on DVD