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Getting Schooled

USA 2016
produced by
Courtney Sandifer, Mike Fair, Nick W. Nicholson (executive), Jennifer Gidel (executive) for Lucky Chucky Productions
directed by Chuck Norfolk
starring Mayra Leal, Tom Long, Roland Ruiz, Morgan Tyler, Susan Ly, Jake Byrd, Ron Jeremy, Nick W. Nicholson, Paula Marcenaro Solinger
written by Tim Norfolk, Chuck Norfolk, Steven Scott Norfolk, music by Mike Fair, special makeup effects by Gilbert Cortez, Kirk Mayberry, Christopher Dale White, visual effects by Garrett Stolpe

review by
Mike Haberfelner

Your typical 1980s high school: Jock Mike (Jake Byrd), prom queen Hillary (Morgan Tyler), nerd Shelly (Susan Ly), juvenile delinquent Rusty (Roland Ruiz) and outcast Julie (Mayra Leal) are all condemned to spend their Saturday morning in detention, to be overlooked by new teacher Mr Roker (Tom Long), a wheelchair-bound Vietnam veteran. Rather by accident then, Mr Roker is knocked out, and when he shows violent tentencies upon coming to, the kids just lock him away to calm down - really the most sensible idea under the circumstances, but when they want to let him out again, he seems to have found his own escape ... which is bad, since the incident seems to have triggered a psychosis Mr Roker has brought home from Vietnam, and now he thinks the kids are the enemy and he has to take them down. And out heroes only comprehend in what kind of a fit they are when they hear the school's principal (Nick W. Nicholson) being tortured to death. They take all kinds of precautions, arm themselves (with what kinds of arms you can find in a high school of course), set traps and everything ... but Mr Roper, despite wheelchair-bound, is full of tricks since he was with the black ops, the meanest and most ruthlessly violent of the army squads - and he's out for blood ...

Ron Jeremy plays the school janitor, Paula Marcenaro Solinger a dancing librarian who ends up being the very first kill.

 

If you've loved 1980s cinema, you'll like this ... and if you loathed it, chances are you will as well, as Getting Schooled is a loving yet tongue-in-cheek hommage to films from that period, and by no means just slasher flicks. Actually, the premise of the movie is almost a carbon copy of The Breakfast Club, and fans will no doubt spot allusions to many other John Hughes movies in this one, and also Vietnam and army movies of the era get their fair nod. And it's all made possible by the right eye for yesteryear's style and (bad synthie pop) music, and also a reliance on yesterday's morals, mirrored in some intentionally stilted mono- and dialogues. But that said, the movie still creates enough tension and suspense to keep one on one's edge of one's seat anyways, and has its fair share of gruesomeness to keep the gorehounds entertained. So whichever way you want to put it, it's good fun.

 

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review © by Mike Haberfelner

 

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In times of uncertainty of a possible zombie outbreak, a woman has to decide between two men - only one of them's one of the undead.

 

There's No Such Thing as Zombies
starring
Luana Ribeira, Rudy Barrow and Rami Hilmi
special appearances by
Debra Lamb and Lynn Lowry

 

directed by
Eddie Bammeke

written by
Michael Haberfelner

produced by
Michael Haberfelner, Luana Ribeira and Eddie Bammeke

 

now streaming at

Amazon

Amazon UK

Vimeo

 

 

 

Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
cuddly toys and
shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

is all of that.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
-
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
the twisted mind of
screenwriter and film reviewer
Michael Haberfelner.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

the new anthology by
Michael Haberfelner

 

Out now from
Amazon!!!