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Cleopatra Jones

USA 1973
produced by
William Tennant for Warner Brothers
directed by Jack Starrett
starring Tamara Dobson, Shelley Winters, Antonio Fargas, Dan Frazer, Bernie Casey, Brenda Sykes, Bill McKinney, Stafford Morgan, Michael Warren, Albert Popwell, Caro Kenyatta, Esther Rolle, Keith Hamilton, Jay Montgomery, Hedley Mattingly, Christopher Joy
written by Max Julien, Sheldon Keller, fighting instructor Bong So Hon

Cleopatra Jones

review by
Mike Haberfelner

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Available on DVD!

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Always make sure of DVD-compatibility!!!
Special agent Cleopatra Jones (Tamara Dobson) is busy bombing (bombing ?) opium poppy-fields in Turkey, much to the dismay of Mammie (Shelley Winters), who could use the plant in large quantities to produce heroin. So she has a clever idea to stop her that is just so convoluted from the start it has to go wrong: Mammie has Cleo's favourite community center,  a drug rehab center run by Reuben (Bernie Casey), busted by the police, so she will come back to America in person to set things straight. But Mammie plans that straight at the airport, her goons will assassinate Cleo - of course it doesn't work, silly !

But Cleo does not only calm down Reuben & his men, she also goes to the offensive, not only trying to smoke out the rotten egghorn in the police force (which is led by sympathtic Captain Crawford [Dan Frazer]) & she tries to get to Mammie via her right hand man Doodlebug (Antonio Fargas, great as usual) - even though some of Mammie's assassins make an attempt at Reuben's life.

But Cleo, sometimes helped by the Kung Fu brothers Matthew & Melvin (Albert Popwell & Caro Kenyatta) stops at nothing to get to Mammie, & soon, Doodlebug, noticing that Mammie is helpless against Cleo, announces he splits ways with her ... but even if Mammie is helpless against Cleo, she is still more than able to dispose of Doodlebug & gang ... all but Doodlebug's girlfriend Tiffany (Brenda Sykes) - who of course comes running to Cleo & with her help, Cleo gets enough dirt on the bad cop within the force, detective Purdy (Bill McKinney) to have him arrested.

However, as soon as he is behind bars the real traitor, detective Kert (Stafford Morgan), whom Cleo trusted, makes himself known, & promptly delivers Cleo & Tiffany to Mammie. & Mammie, having chosen a scrapyard as scenery for their meeting, thinks it fit that Cleo & Tiffany should die in a car that is sent through a trash-mincing machine ... but she hasn't taken into acount the Kung Fu brothers, who soon arrive with their gang, & they & Cleo give Mammie & her men a sound beating before Mammie falls into the trashmincer herself.

 

Glossily produced by a major Hollywood studio (Warner, in case you wondered), Cleopatra Jones of course lacks the down-&-dirtyness of typical blaxploitation fare by independent producers, even the heroine is not a streetwise sister with ghetto-roots but a special agent for the gouvernment who goes through more outfit-changes than a fashionmodel on the catwalk, who drives a fancy Corvette & has some knowledge of Kung Fu (though the fight scenes are so poorly staged one might be surprised to learn they actually had an Oriental fight instructor).

However, this apparent cheesyness makes Cleopatra Jones a very watchable, entertaining & funny movie, even if most of the laughs, it seems, are unintentional.

 

review © by Mike Haberfelner

 

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Thanks for watching !!!

 

 

In times of uncertainty of a possible zombie outbreak, a woman has to decide between two men - only one of them's one of the undead.

 

There's No Such Thing as Zombies
starring
Luana Ribeira, Rudy Barrow and Rami Hilmi
special appearances by
Debra Lamb and Lynn Lowry

 

directed by
Eddie Bammeke

written by
Michael Haberfelner

produced by
Michael Haberfelner, Luana Ribeira and Eddie Bammeke

 

now streaming at

Amazon

Amazon UK

Vimeo

 

 

 

Robots and rats,
demons and potholes,
cuddly toys and
shopping mall Santas,
love and death and everything in between,
Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

is all of that.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to
-
a collection of short stories and mini-plays
ranging from the horrific to the darkly humourous,
from the post-apocalyptic
to the weirdly romantic,
tales that will give you a chill and maybe a chuckle, all thought up by
the twisted mind of
screenwriter and film reviewer
Michael Haberfelner.

 

Tales to Chill
Your Bones to

the new anthology by
Michael Haberfelner

 

Out now from
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